At the moment, I am not much of a climber. I believe it is a relatively accessible badge to earn. To be a climber, you must climb. It doesn’t matter how “good” you are at the thing. It also doesn’t matter if you get paid to do the thing. You just have to do the thing: To be an ultra runner, you must run ultra distances. To be a model, you must model. To be a musician, you must make or perform music. To be an actor, you must act.
At one time or another (sometimes a few of them at the same time) I have identified as each of those things, but, if defined by my current actions, I am none of those things.
Today, in practice, I am a husband, a father, a fear coach, and a writer. Relative to the 35 years I have occupied my lanky tattooed flesh vessel, these current identities are relatively new—husband for 2+ years, father for 1 year, fear coach for 5+ years, and writer…oh man, how long have I been a writer? How much action defines the role? That is a discussion for another time. Personally, I have been inconsistently publishing blog posts here for a little over a year, there have also been many stretches of time where I have written poetry and song lyrics at high volume(there was a chapter of my life where I wrote a 16 line poem every day for over 500 days straight), but now…now I am fucking writing a book.
The seeds of this book planted themselves in my brain over a year ago with a poem turned essay turned blog post called, “Fear is a Barking Dog”. Since then, the idea has patiently waited, twiddling its proverbial thumbs, graciously watching me procrastinate.
If we subscribe to the concept that ideas are their own entities—that we don’t have ideas, but rather ideas come to us in order to be realized in the material world—which I very much do, then I feel indebted to this particular idea. I am grateful for its patience and trust in me and my slow delicate process of developing and finding the courage to commit to bringing it to life.
Thank you, Idea.
How did I beat the procrastination and overwhelm and self diagnosed ADD paralysis and become a writer by way of writing, you ask? I followed my own advice and I found a coach. Well, truth be told, my mother found a coach and started writing her own book and I asked if she would share and she said of course and now my mom and I are both writing books and sharing a writing coach—totally normal stuff.
I digress.
Here’s the point(s):
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Whatever it is you want to do, whoever it is you want to be, all boils down to the action you take. The best time to start has already passed. The second best time is now.
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If you want to excel, find yourself a coach you connect with. “Self-made” is overrated and oftentimes a stupid lie. The people who are the best at what they do have coaches. Period.
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I am writing a book. I will be sharing bits of the process and maybe also potentially bits of the writing along the way (I might need a fear coach to help me with the latter half of that statement LOL)
If you are curious about any part of any of these points, I’d love to hear from you! You can reach me at gobeyondwithdex@gmail.com or on instagram @gobeyond.love.
With gratitude,
Dex